guerilladanceparty:

Is alcohol your favorite drug? If so, why? If not, what is?

What is this, a consumer survey? Are you a drug dealer looking for suggestions? Why would you ask me, when it says on my profile I don’t do drugs? Seriously, wtf?

Write back: No. My favorite drug is actually GHB. When guys use truly moronic, irrelevant, pompous openers on me over okcupid, I ask them out, slip some GHB into their drinks while they’re in the men’s room, and then, after they’re incapacitated, I take them out in my launch to a small wooded island in the middle of the willamette and leave them there. Some of them are still there I believe; it’s kind of a ‘Lord of the Flies’ scenario.
Anyway, excuse my longwinded answer. Do you want to go out on a date?